Golf Etiquette

     We are now approaching the time of year when the tourists arrive in droves, and some of them actually pay good money to play on our golf course. Some consider these tourists a minor inconvenience, while others regard them as a plague of Biblical proportions. We know that you have come to believe that this is your personal golf course and, at many times of the year, the place is so empty it might be easy for you to regard it as your own private domain. And we also know that it is frustrating to play at a good pace and then come to a screeching halt behind a family of four that are having a hard time figuring out which end of a golf club they should hold. It is easy to curse at them, yell loudly and jump up and down. To make matter worse, some of you fire golf balls at them--as though you were firing a warning shot across their bows. I

     Imagine how badly this reflects on all of us: instead of patiently waiting and, perhaps, giving them a hand, some prefer to hit golf balls in their direction in the hope that they will learn their lesson, let you play through, and regret that they have ever thought to set foot on our sacred ground. Not only is this practice immature, it is dangerous. Take a moment to relax. Examine the clouds and the fairways in front of you. Think about how lucky we are to live here, think about what a nice day it is to be out with good friends enjoying a game of golf. Practice chip shots with your playing partners: aim at the tee box markers. Tell a terrible joke. Slow down. Make the tourist that comes to play at our course feel welcome. After all, the money he spends helps fund the year round luxury we enjoy.

     When I say all this, keep in mind that this philosophy does not apply to motor homes. I swear that the next time I have to follow a motor home that drives at 40 klicks, rides the brakes and slows down to 15 km on ALL curves, instead of turning off at the golf course, I will follow the culprit until he stops and I don’t care if the next stop is in Lethbridge, Alberta. And after I am finished with him, I will go after the rest of his family.